Something to Write About...

As some of you may have noticed, it has yet again been a long time since my last post. I've been thinking lately about wanting to write more often, but one of the problems I run into is knowing what to write about (another problem would be my procrastination problem I wrote about in my last post). This blog's purpose is to write about stuff I've been thinking about. But I realized that sometimes it goes the other way. You can come up with stuff to write about that causes you to think. So I decided to come up with something that will get the juices flowing. I actually kind of like "features" that other bloggers do. As a way to focus, direct, or motivate thought, I decided to try to come up with my own weekday features. Honestly, they may not last at all. But I like the idea, so here goes. The first "feature" I've come up with is "Typical Tuesday". (I like that alliteration, don't you?) What I mean here is that there are so many things worth writing about that kinda don't seem like they're worth writing about. Normal stuff that happens every day. Typical stuff. We come to expect it, or think about it a lot. Or just recognize that this is how life is most of the time. Routines are prevalent here. But really, it is significant to us. It means something, no matter how "ordinary" or "typical" it seems. It's important to us. It's important to me. And that's worth writing about.

I've been thinking lately about how much I love being home with my family. It's easy to understand why. Since I got married, I've spent a lot of time outside of work doing other stuff, like school, church callings, extra work, etc. Some stuff is kind of fun for me (such as choirs and I was even in a band for a little while). I have been so lucky to have so many opportunities like these. However, there is definitely something that all of these have had in common: time away from my family. I look back and recognize that there have been plenty of days when I got home after everyone was already in bed, and I'm up and gone before they get up in the morning.

Anyway, so lately, all I've had going on is my church calling as an 11-yr-old scout leader and primary teacher. We hold scouts every other week, so that's the only time I have to do anything during my family time. There are days when I work a little late. And I have lots of days when I go back into work after the kids are in bed and I've spent some time chatting with Rhoda. But I've had more time with my wife and kids lately than I think I've ever had in my entire married life.

Most of the times that I spend with my family, it's not like anything special is going on. It's not like there is always an event or specific thing that I'm home for. I'm just home. We do things like read books, play the Wii, and occasionally just sit and chat about things. My point is, it's not like these moments are just action-packed and always exciting, so the question that comes to my mind is, "Why do I enjoy it so much?" I guess it's because even ordinary things are extraordinary.

That's the point of a "Typical Tuesday" post. I think about things all the time. They are not usually what I would label as "profound" thoughts, but they are my thoughts. And just because they are ordinary thoughts, it doesn't mean I can't share them. I just want to share some of the ordinary experiences that I have that are extraordinary experiences if looked at in the right light.  That's what my "Typical Tuesday" is all about.

In reality, when I thought about this, I did have a specific ordinary thing I was going to post about, but this post is long enough already, so I'll save it for another "Typical Tuesday".

Flaws

I know that most people would disagree with me on this point, but I'm going to level with you: I have a lot of flaws. I know, I know, most of you (if there are any of you reading this crappy [crabby?] blog) just thought, "What? Flaws? What on earth is this crazy talk!? Is he feeling OK?"

And yet it's true. I do have many flaws. The biggest problem that I have is that I don't really ever seem to get around to addressing my flaws to improve myself, no matter how much I want to.

Which brings me to my (probably) single-most self-frustrating flaw: I am a procrastinator. Why is it that procrastination has to be so easy for me? I've been meaning to write a post about procrastination for a long time, but I just never got around to it. *smirk*

According to the dictionary, procrastiation is simply to defer action. I think the frustrating thing about this is that when I have something else to try to improve on, my procrastination kicks in and I put off starting on it. In other words, I don't take any action to make the improvements. I find myself putting things off until it is either too late, or at least almost too late. Rhoda hates it. Truth be told, I hate it. But I just let it happen anyway. What's up with that?

I've recently read these quotes about procrastination, and they resonate with me:

To think too long about doing a thing often becomes its undoing. ~Eva Young

I love this one because this is too often my problem. I like to do things in the "best", "most efficient" way I possibly can. This results in my analyzing it to death to figure out what way that is. So to save myself 10 minutes on a task, I might have analyzed it for 20 minutes. Doesn't really make sense when you look at it like that.

Procrastination is the thief of time. ~Edward Young

How many times have I just not had time to do something the way it should be done, or had to cut corners or had to make bigger-than-necessary sacrifices to do something because I put it off?

Procrastination is opportunity's assassin. ~Victor Kiam

This one rings very true for me. How many opportunities have I missed because I put something off? It could be small, unimportant things, like going to see a movie that I really want to see in the theater because it was out of theaters before I ever found time to go. Or it could be huge costly things, like not returning something or getting something fixed before the warranty expires, even though it broke before.

Procrastination usually results in sorrowful regret. ~Ida Scott Taylor

This one kills me. I think about the opportunities I may have missed because of procrastination, such as spending time with Rhoda. Or my kids. Or the fact that I'm a crappy home teacher because I never get around to making those darn appointments. Or missing a deadline. And the problem is that all of those things don't affect just me. Rhoda, the kids, my home teaching families -- they all lose out on that too. And that's something that I definitely regret.

So I'm thinking that in my journey to better myself, the first thing I need to do is improve on this thing. In other words, DON'T PUT IT OFF!

So what is the solution? How exactly does one go about kicking the habit of procrastinating? Or is it even possible?

I'll look into that later.

I Have A Bad Memory

I don't really have a very good memory for a lot of things. I'm not good with names. If I didn't keep an updated calendar, I would forget a lot of events. I don't even remember a lot of past events with all that much clarity.

So believe me when I say that I'm a prime candidate for forgetting important dates and events.

However, I have to say that there are a few dates that remain fixed in my head and I can't even fathom forgetting them (even though I might forget to actually do something about these dates). See, a lot of important dates I remember sort of hit-and-miss. Like someone says the date and I think "it seems like something is special about that date" or something like that. These ones, though, are different. There's no pause in the thought process while I try to figure out why that date sounds familiar. It just comes immediately to my mind. Like that date is forever tied to that event, no matter what else happens on that date.

I guess most of those dates are life-long events. Dates I've celebrated my whole life, every year on that date. Some of those dates are:

• January 1st. New Year's Day. A new beginning. This year's gonna be different. Forgetting to write the new year for the first few weeks (at least) of the year, because you've been writing last year's year for a whole year!
• 4th of July. Cause, you know, it's CALLED the 4th of July and it HAPPENS on the 4th of July.
• December 24th & 25th. Christmas Eve & Christmas Day. This has always been a magical, great time of year (some people even say it's the MOST WONDERFUL TIME of the year).
• August 5th. My birthday. Or the anniversary of my natal day, as my grandpa would call it. See, I've been celebrating that day for my whole life. It came with great excitement and anticipation when I was young. (I think part of the reason I like my birthday is that I'm just arrogant enough to think I deserve my own holiday, and that's about as close as it gets.)

But here's the thing. There are a few dates that change us. They are NOT dates we have associated with certain events for our whole lives, yet somehow they end up being just as clearly tied to those events as the life-long ones.

Some of the dates that change us are publicly tragic events, like September 11th. Will anyone ever be able to say "September 11th" without many of us thinking about the World Trade Center? Others are privately tragic events, like June 28th, the day I lost my dad.

Other dates that change us are dates when something wonderful happens. It's not hard for me to remember, for example, my kids' birthdays. Such a blessing to see each of those special children be born into our family. Or my anniversary. September 21st. The cloudy/intermittently-rainy day that Rhoda and I were sealed for eternity in the Salt Lake Temple.


So why this post on this particular day? It's not a birthday or a wedding anniversary. It's not a widely-celebrated holiday.

It is a celebration of an extremely pivotal day in my life, though. Let me set the stage:

It was the year 2000. I was working at Discover Card, hating my job as a phone sales guy, but it paid some bills and was pretty flexible, which were very desirable traits in a job because I was going to school. In fact, I had just finished up my first semester of post-mission college. I would try to spend as much time as humanly possible with my favorite person in the whole world, Rhoda. We'd even talked a little about getting married, without any real specifics. Much to her dismay, I would always be on the lookout to try to surprise her (she's not a big fan of surprises). Verlene, Rhoda's sister (and roommate at the time), was always game for covert missions to assist in these surprises. Thanks to another successful mission, I was able to even get Rhoda's ring size without her suspecting a thing (at least not that she's ever admitted to). I searched and searched for rings. I went to several stores, and tried to imagine a ring that Rhoda would love and WANT to wear for the rest of her life (and not just because of what it symbolized. I also wanted her to love it on it's own merit as a piece of jewelry). I knew when I found it that it was the one. I was so excited. I made my plans.

I don't remember why, but we were going up to her parents' house in Idaho for some reason (was that the fateful "Sedgwick Yellowstone Trip"?), so we scheduled the time off work. I suggested that just for fun, we go up to this picnic area up one of the canyons that I had heard her talk about a number of times. So we picked up Subway sandwiches and headed up the canyon to Moss Ledge. We picked the highest of the picnic tables. We ate and had good conversation. It was beautiful up there. No wonder it was her favorite place. As things were winding down, I was getting more and more nervous. Finally, when Rhoda was I'm sure thinking "why don't we just leave already, we've been here forever!", I knelt down and proposed. I think it surprised her. And, to my relief, she actually said yes!

Ever since then, June 16th will always be etched in my mind as one of those days that changed my life. Literally forever. We try each year on that day (or close to it) to go up to Moss Ledge (or close to it) with our Subway sandwiches. It's a family event. The kids love to go too. Each time we go, I survey the scene and remember back to one of the most important days of my entire life.

And so today, weather-permitting, we're headed up to the canyon with our Subway sandwiches. And I will remember and reflect on the joy and excitement of that memorable September 16th from 11 years ago.

Thanks, Rhoda, for changing my life 11 years ago, and pretty much every day since. I love you more than you could know.

Catching Up

In many ways, I feel like one of the reasons I don't post on my blog very often is because there is too much to write about. There is just so much going on that it makes me want to not even start.

But, as we procrastinators always find out in the end, you eventually gotta do it anyway, so why put it off? At least that's what I've been saying for the last few months.

There's just something about looking at your blog and seeing this in the blog archive:

->2011 (1)

It's one thing to see that in January. Quite another in June.

So here goes. I have some ideas that will hopefully keep me going on this blog. Don't get me wrong, it's not like what I have to say is important. I just like reading what other people have to say, so I thought I'd allow others the same opportunity.

Probably the most notable thing that has happened since I last blogged is that my little brother has left on his mission. What? I didn't post about it? I don't think I've said a word about it on here. Shame on me. Well, I have watched him as he got his papers ready, sent them in, anticipated his call, opened his call, and then waited and waited to actually leave. That day finally came almost 2 weeks ago now. He's in the MTC, learning Spanish. He's headed to Mexico. For the particulars, you can catch his blog, Ukulately (because he likes to play the uke). My wonderful wife has agreed to update it while he is out there (provided she receives any information to post). :)

It isn't so much that I wanted to talk about where he's going or the nostalgia I feel as I've watched this whole process take place.

It's just plain and simply this:

I am proud of my brother.

He is truly a unique and remarkable young man. He is extraordinarily talented. And most of all, he is a good man as well. He cares about other people, and he doesn't hesitate to do what is right. He has truly been an inspiration to me. And not just with the mission, but with his life. I am honored to call him my brother.

I hope he works hard and also enjoys his mission. I hope he follows the mission rules to the letter. I hope he feels the comforting guidance of the Spirit. I know there will be times when he struggles, emotionally, spiritually, and maybe even physically, but I hope he knows where he can turn for help. I hope that I can be the supportive older brother that he needs while he's there, and beyond. I certainly could have done better up to this point.

So I'll write him. Maybe even a little more often than I've been updating my blog lately!

Um...Hi there!

So I don't know if anyone has noticed, but I haven't posted in a while. It's not that I don't have anything to think about or write about. And I'd like to say that I have simply been far too busy to post anything. But I have to accept reality. It's just laziness. I read something today that struck me as somewhat profound, so I thought I'd mention it...and hopefully get the ball rolling again with posting more.

"Doing the unrealistic is easier than doing the realistic. It’s lonely at the top. Ninety-nine percent of people in the world are convinced they are incapable of achieving great things, so they aim for mediocre. The level of competition is thus fiercest for 'realistic' goals, paradoxically making them the most time- and energy-consuming… The fishing is best where the fewest go, and the collective insecurity of the world makes it easy for people to hit home runs while everyone else is aiming for base hits. There is just less competition for bigger goals."

I don't know if I agree completely with that, especially when the goal is related to personal betterment. I mean, the only competition for that is with yourself, right? But then I read on:

"Unreasonable and unrealistic goals are easier to achieve for yet another reason. Having an unusually large goal is an adrenaline infusion that provides the endurance to overcome the inevitable trials and tribulations that go along with any goal. Realistic goals, goals restricted to the average ambition level, are uninspiring and will only fuel you through the first or second problem, at which point you will throw in the towel."

I guess the thing that popped into my head was the question, "Why would you want to strive for mediocrity anyway?" When you say it that way, it sounds really lame. But then I thought about it some more, and realized that I do it every day. I don't necessarily set goals to BE mediocre, but that's pretty much what happens when I'm not making a goal and working at it to try to be better.

Anyway, there are many things in life that I CAN and WANT to do better at, and changing them all at once has always seemed like such an unrealistic goal. Maybe I have been limiting myself, though. Why don't I just make the goal and run with it? I just have to formulate the goals so I know what I am trying to do and who I am trying to become.