Um...Hi there!

So I don't know if anyone has noticed, but I haven't posted in a while. It's not that I don't have anything to think about or write about. And I'd like to say that I have simply been far too busy to post anything. But I have to accept reality. It's just laziness. I read something today that struck me as somewhat profound, so I thought I'd mention it...and hopefully get the ball rolling again with posting more.

"Doing the unrealistic is easier than doing the realistic. It’s lonely at the top. Ninety-nine percent of people in the world are convinced they are incapable of achieving great things, so they aim for mediocre. The level of competition is thus fiercest for 'realistic' goals, paradoxically making them the most time- and energy-consuming… The fishing is best where the fewest go, and the collective insecurity of the world makes it easy for people to hit home runs while everyone else is aiming for base hits. There is just less competition for bigger goals."

I don't know if I agree completely with that, especially when the goal is related to personal betterment. I mean, the only competition for that is with yourself, right? But then I read on:

"Unreasonable and unrealistic goals are easier to achieve for yet another reason. Having an unusually large goal is an adrenaline infusion that provides the endurance to overcome the inevitable trials and tribulations that go along with any goal. Realistic goals, goals restricted to the average ambition level, are uninspiring and will only fuel you through the first or second problem, at which point you will throw in the towel."

I guess the thing that popped into my head was the question, "Why would you want to strive for mediocrity anyway?" When you say it that way, it sounds really lame. But then I thought about it some more, and realized that I do it every day. I don't necessarily set goals to BE mediocre, but that's pretty much what happens when I'm not making a goal and working at it to try to be better.

Anyway, there are many things in life that I CAN and WANT to do better at, and changing them all at once has always seemed like such an unrealistic goal. Maybe I have been limiting myself, though. Why don't I just make the goal and run with it? I just have to formulate the goals so I know what I am trying to do and who I am trying to become.

Noise is Loudest in the Quiet

Maybe it's just me, but have you ever noticed that the times when you are trying to be SUPER quiet are the times that you seem to be the worst at being quiet? Most mornings, I'm the first one up to start the morning routine, so I try really hard to be quiet so as not to disturb everyone else who is still sleeping. Sometimes, when I'm trying to be EXTRA quiet, I find myself stubbing my toe on something, or knocking things over. I even make it worse by trying to catch what I knocked over and end up knocking even more things down. I think part of it is just that everything seems louder in stark contrast to how quiet you are trying to be, but it seems genuinely true as well that things like that happen more often when you are going out of your way to be quiet.

It's kind of like being TOO cautious when you're driving, and you end up CAUSING the accident rather than preventing it. (DISCLAIMER: I do not advocate not driving cautiously, but I do feel as if you CAN overdo it.)

Life seems kinda like that for me right now. Don't get me wrong. I am so blessed. I recognize how many things are going well for me and I'm so thankful for all I have. I've noticed, however, that often, much to my frustration, the harder I work at something, the further I get from accomplishing it. I have been trying to do better about a lot of things lately, and it just seems like I take one step forward and two steps back. Still, any effort at all is probably better overall than no effort, so I'll keep trying. It's just frustrating that it turns out that way.

Learned Something Today

So a few weeks ago, I was getting irritated with how many times I had to repeat my instructions to my almost-9-year-old. Once I had his attention, I tried to calmly explain that he needs to try to listen a little better. He then said, "I know, mom talked to me about this. I tune you guys out and can't hear you, so I need to be careful about that." And so I left it at that. He definitely didn't need the same lecture twice.

Today in Sunday School, I taught a lesson about service. One of the things we talked about in the class was what we can do to be ready to help people and provide service. One of the most important things we can do is to be in tune to promptings from our Heavenly Father, so He can tell us what others need help with.

It dawned on me today during my lesson that we as people do the same thing we've been working on with my son. How many times does the Lord try to get our attention, only to find that we've tuned Him out and we only listen when it's convenient, or good timing. I can definitely do better about about responding when He calls on me for something.

It kind of made me wonder if He goes through the same frustrations with us as we do with our kids. He loves us and wants the best for us, but we so often get in the way of Him giving us blessings or teaching us the lessons that we need to be prepared for life.

Something to think about anyway.

Change is Good...Right?

So for those of you out there who don't know, I am starting a new job on the 18th. Well, kind of. It's not really a new job. I've been doing some consulting in addition to my regular full time work, and the people I've been doing consulting for offered me a great position working full time for them. So I'm starting a new job, but I'm going to be working on some of the same stuff for the same company I've been working with for some time now.

I've felt really good about this change, so I'm not even questioning it, but I thought I'd just list good and bad things about the switch:

The Good:

• I have felt like this is a great time for me to change jobs. I've been working at my current job for almost 5 years now, and I don't want to be too stagnant, so in the back of my mind, I've already been thinking about looking.
• I've been putting in (on average) about 10-15 hours per week with my consulting, as well as putting some extra hours into my regular job to try to get ahead there, so I haven't been home much. This new job (and only one job, no consulting for now) will allow me to spend way more time at home with my family (yay!)
• I drive about 40 miles round trip to work right now. After the job change it'll be about 5. So I'll spend less time on the road (meaning even more time with the fam), plus I'll use way less gas and put way fewer miles on my car.
• I'm kind of kidding about this one, but I get to get a fresh start with my "to do" list. My current to do list at work is HUGE! Granted, most of it isn't just a "to do" list, but a "would like to do" list. There are so many things that are on my list as "If I can get to it" tasks. It'll be nice to be starting with a pretty clean slate (not completely clean, because I've already got a couple of things that I've been working on in my consulting).
• It really is a great offer. In fact, in a lot of ways, this new company has gone out of it's way to make the offer so nice and be so helpful as I transition over. It's hard to ignore the fact that they obviously were willing to go to that much effort to convince me to change jobs.

The Not-So-Good:

• At my current job, I have had a chance to be so involved, not only with my own team, but with all different areas of the company. It's hard to leave a place and people you know so well. Especially the people I work the closest with. We've worked through some crazy stuff, not just at work, but in our personal lives as well. So leaving those people is hard. And meeting and trying to get to know a whole new set of people is difficult as well. I hope everyone's ok with me calling them "hey you", or "dude" for a while.
• Over the last 5 years, I have learned so much about the systems and data that I work with every day, along with much of the company's processes and procedures. Going to a new company where I know very little of this information is a little intimidating. I just have to remember that I started in the same boat 5 years ago and was just fine.
• Change is always hard. I am a man of routine. I have the same morning schedule every morning. I eat the same breakfast. For the most part, I drive the same route to places once I find the one I like. I don't really try new things all that often. So that's a little uncomfortable. But the silver lining to this item is that the change isn't as big as it could be if I was getting hired by a company I'd never consulted for.
• And there are a couple of silly little things. For example, at my current job, we have parking under my building. So I pretty much never have to clean off my car in the winter. I just drive from my garage to the parking garage and back. It's an outdoor lot at my new job. Related to that, it's been nice always having a free parking spot downtown. That goes away too.

All in all, as I mentioned, it feels like the right thing to do, so ultimately it's what I am going to do, regardless of the pro/con list. But it's nice that there are so many benefits with this change. It makes the change itself more manageable.

And I'd like also add that I just feel grateful to even have a job. I've loved working where I've been working. I've learned and grown so much. It has been a fantastic experience, and I think it has helped to shape me and my career. It has been great. I also would like to add that my experience thus far with the new company has been very positive as well. I will get to learn lots of new things there, as well as hone the skills I've already gained. I can't help but think that I'm just really lucky.

I'm so blessed...

and excited...

and a little sad...

but happy.

You know?

3652....

So I like numbers.

You know how some people doodle on their papers when they're bored? I do too, but it often has to do with numbers. Not so much anymore, but I would even write my own math problems to solve. As a doodle. Oh, and I will often do math problems either in my head or on paper, even if it takes way longer than pulling out a calculator. Yeah. So that's me.

Anyway, so I thought it was only fitting that I share with you a few of my favorite numbers:

1: The number of times I've fallen in love.

2: The number of people in a marriage.

4: The number of kids I am fortunate to have.

5: The number of times I've moved since I got married.

6: The size of my family.

10: The number of years in a decade (and how many years I've been married!)

14: The number of years since we met.

3652: The number of days that I've been married to Rhoda.

12100: Days since I was born

30%: Percentage of my life I've been married and to my sweetheart

5392: Number of times I've screwed something up and yet Rhoda still finds it in her heart to forgive me. (OK, so I made up that number, but it's probably pretty close.)

And I think this is probably my favorite:
infinity: The number of years I can be with Rhoda. Forever. That's good, because I don't think anything less would be long enough.

I love her so much. She puts up with my procrastination, flakiness, my inability to make a quick decision. She listens to full-length versions of stories because I can't seem to figure out how to tell the Reader's Digest version. She supports me in everything I try to do. She has been a rock and anchor in turbulent times in my life. She is such a part of me and my life. She means everything to me. I wish I were better about showing it to her. She truly is 1 in 6.7 billion, and I can't believe the good fortune that has been mine to be married to her for the past decade.

Here's to many more.

Utah State Fair!

So we have made a tradition of going to the state fair EVERY year. Our kids absolutely love it. We usually make a big loop around the fair. There are a few must-see items on the list.

This is usually how it goes. First, to the The Amazing Butter Cow (Aunt Debbie does an amazing job on it every year!), and then up and around to Little Hands on the Farm. The kids love it. They get to feed and milk a (fake) cow. They get to plant a (fake) seed and pick the (fake) fruits and vegetables. They get to brush a (fake) sheep and a couple of other things too. At the end they get to pick a treat (a small bag of chips, a string cheese, a little thing of milk, and they have a few other things too). Anyway, then we almost always ride the big yellow slide. Not sure if Rusty will again. He said afterwords something to the effect: "That ride is not fun!" After that, we will usually then go ride a couple of other rides, and then walk through to see all the sheep, cows, pigs, and goats on our way out. I also thought I'd mention that I just about ALWAYS run into someone I know at the fair, which is kind of weird because it's such a big place and there are so many people there. Crazy.

Oh, and I think I'll take this opportunity to admit that I am a people-watcher. I find other people fascinating. Especially when they don't appear to be just normal, every day people. Don't you just wonder what some people are thinking (or maybe obviously NOT thinking) when they say something or dress a certain way? I know I do. Truth be told, the fair is a great place for people-watching. I'm not saying that EVERYONE that goes is totally abnormal. I mean, WE go (oh wait, that probably doesn't help my arguement). But there seems to be a very high percentage of the weird ones at the fair.

So as we went to the fair, I was looking forward to a bit of this people-watching, expecting some good entertainment (the state fair hasn't failed me yet in this department). Imagine my surprise, then, when the tables were turned and I occasionally caught people staring at ME when I walked by. I would think "You've got it backwards, buddy - I should be staring at YOU." At first, I was a little weirded out. Then I realized that they were trying to read what it said on my shirt before I passed them. HAHA! I was wearing one of my "funny" shirts. I love it. It reads, "I'm sorry, I can't hear you over the sound of how AWESOME I AM" (I love it cause it true, right? Cause I'm awesome like that, right? RIGHT?!). Yeah, so that's why they were staring. And maybe it was the shoes too.

Of course, so I wondered how many times other people have worn shirts with sayings on them that I stared at long enough to read, and wondering if people thought later "why was that weird guy staring at me?" Oh well. I'll have to watch that.

Anyway, we had a great time. It's fun to have traditions. And in keeping with that tradition, on the way home, just like always, the kids said "Goodbye Utah State Fair! See you next year!" Indeed.

Things That Make a Semi-Geeky Father Proud...

So I was thinking today that we are raising a whole passel of at least semi-geeky Crabbs.  Here are some examples:

Rusty has really started to like playing on the computer.

Wes gets a kick out of movie quotes. He thinks it's hilarious when ANYONE quotes a funny line from a show.

Mily loves to read. She just entered first grade, and she says that they tested her reading and apparently she tested at a 4th grade level! I walked past the front room just a few minutes ago, and out of all the things she could have been doing on a Saturday afternoon, there she was sitting in the chair, just reading away. And I'm told that she read for like 2½ hours yesterday!

 

Josh's favorite Wii game (for the last little while anyway) has been Lego Star Wars. Sometimes when I tell him about the movies, he can play the game better because he understands more of what he's supposed to do.  It's been a while since I've seen them all, so I'm thinking that we need to watch them together.

So I'm sorry, kids, but it looks like you've inherited at least some of your father's geekiness.  Hopefully people in Jr. High and High School don't hold it against you.